On my way to Florida for the weekend…my driver decided that he was having issues with traffic so I had to walk 3 blocks and halfway down an avenue to find him…with all of my crap. I recognize that he has driven me a few times and he is a mix between overly nice and kinda creepy…which is a fine line. This trip he provided me with granola bars, water and chargers for my phone. He asked me to make sure I put all of my phone numbers on my account because it’s important that we are “able to communicate”. He also let me know that his wife thinks he has a girlfriend because he messages on Facebook all the time and he doesn’t get women, but he gets me. We aren’t dating yeeeettt, butttt fingers-crossed.

I get through security and walk to my gate behind a pilot that has a bodybuilding.com sticker on his suitcase. Please note: he weighs maybe a buck-twenty soaking wet.

I grab a sandwich and find the only empty seat in the terminal…which it quickly becomes abundantly clear why the seat is available. Then the “OMG we’re going on a girls weekend brigade” starts in. “Don’t worry I have swimsuits…I have everything. This is going to be the best girls weekend ever and my mom is making everything. And Sarah is just SO SO proud of Chloe for having an “open mindset” and dating someone…from Astoria. They are going to have THE best girls weekend and go to all the “oh so cute places and my mom is making all of the food and not using butter and like we are going to have the best wine and OMG don’t worry about anything we are having Fireball and cider tonight…DON’T worry. I’m so proud of you for being so open minded. We can even go to a Target or a Wal-Mart…have you ever been to a Wal-Mart?!” 

Takeaways: I now know the entire menu that Sarah’s Mom is making for the weekend, that Chloe doesn’t like Halloween and it really “isn’t her thing” but she is borrowing that “black skirt” from Sarah for her costume and that Renee (the quiet one) doesn’t know what cider is.

My only solace came from the girl diagonal from me having a “where is Ashton moment”…unable to believe that that this is real life.

Tootles I’m off to sunny Florida!
🙋🙋
#blondiesperception #talesfromacarservice #talesfromtheDeltaterminal #nyc #laguardia #byeeeee